A friend retired not long ago. I knew I would “see her around” occasionally, but we both understood it was the end of an era for us. The days of me popping my head into her office just to say hi would be past. She and I were the only female executives in our office, so it was going to be lonely for me–for both of us in different ways. The week before she left, I spent some time reflecting on the things I treasured about her. One of the things I most appreciate about her is that she regularly modeled how to be a good leader.
Author Anne Ortlund once said there are two kinds of people in the world: Here I am! and There you are! My friend is a there-you-are kind of person. Good leaders realize the organization doesn’t exist to make them rock stars. It’s not all about them. It’s about serving others. They understand part of their job is to inspire and motivate their team. To challenge them without discouraging them. That happens when you show you truly care about them as well as the organization. Effective leaders are there-you-are people.
My friend paved the way for me to work in a male-dominated environment, daily demonstrating how to navigate the sometimes uncertain terrain. As good leaders often do, she saw where people could best use their gifts and she helped them get to those spots. She didn’t hoard the spotlight or seek credit for herself. She didn’t use position or power for personal gain. Instead, she empowered others. She lifted others up.
She was a mentor. She trained her team, coached them through new processes, and came alongside those who struggled. And she was quick to give praise for work well done.
Micromanagement wasn’t her style. She knew how to delegate. It takes humility to admit you don’t know everything and that you might learn from someone else. Or that a colleague might be better at a project, more creative in an approach, or more experienced with a task.
I never heard her dismiss other people’s suggestions with “Oh, everyone has an opinion.” She listened. She understood that she didn’t have the expertise for every detail of every project, so she sought opinions and feedback from sometimes more qualified, skilled, or experienced coworkers. Or, maybe they weren’t more qualified. But she valued their opinions anyway.
She understood the power in teamwork–celebrating individual strengths while recognizing the importance of unity in the group. She looked for ways to allow everyone to shine with their unique skillsets, benefiting the organization and each member of the team. She knew the advantage of seeking the win-win for everyone.
She’s honest, but kind–two virtues that bookend her personality. She showed respect to others even when she didn’t agree with them. Other people’s opinions didn’t threaten her–in fact, she welcomed them.
My friend is a there-you-are kind of person. A great leader. And I miss her.
